Tuesday, October 05, 2010

YOU NEED THIS CRAP!





Thanks to Clayton in Denver for the creepy dolls video! More to come from that gem.

25 comments :

Uncle Staple said...

my god that doll thing was scary. i could not watch the whole thing!

whistlestopmaltshop said...

Unrelated question:

I'm looking for a website that I believe was called 'Kathleen's Siddity World' or something akin to that. It had some absolutely insane animation, including a "feature film" about a haunted house, and a friend of mine doesn't believe it exists. It was mostly done by one woman, including all of the voices and music. Am I imagining this? Help me out.

whistlestopmaltshop said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TrLKcnjx2oQ&feature=related

Never mind, guys, I totally found some of the videos. Still don't know the website name, though.

Also: when I was a little girl, I desperately wanted a My Twinn doll! One of my cousins had one and I just thought it was the coolest thing.

Nate said...

Oh my god! Do you remember My Twinn dolls? me neither...

Also: Boy doll on the conveyor belt. FAG!

The ad for Power Ranger-Os makes me think it was on a Power Rangers VHS

Anonymous said...

"Lastly, the might morphin granola bars" ????

This is just filled with WTF.


Re the dolls: Two Minute Talky Tina: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hSy8Ko1vSKQ

marxmarv said...

"The perfect way to capture the uniqueness of your child at her precious age"? Driver! Stop the bus!

Anonymous said...

It's like they're carrying around little corpses of themselves...creepy. I approve!

Porcine Drone said...

Great tasting food? Just for me???

ThefilmBug said...

I want a twin doll that will look just like me!

VonSandwich said...

So... I had one of those. And I had that white and pink night gown... And I looked just like that girl wearing it and my doll looked like hers.

I remember my mom would get really mad at me because she spent so much money on the doll and I hardly ever played with it.

ihor dawidiuk said...

Good Lord, from what bowels of Hades do you find this sick, aberrant material?

id

Henry_Slinkman said...

I can't hate on those dolls. Imagine being a little girl and feeling sad because all those mass-market dolls don't look like someone like you. I remember them being popular with kids with disabilities because they'll even recreate the child's wheelchair or other medical equipment. And those puppies are too goddamn cute.

But yeah, I'll hate on that Power Rangers food. I'll hate the fuck out of it.

colton said...

I ate all of those power ranger products they were just relabeled name brands but I thought I was so cool back then

Anonymous said...

I remember we used to get those My Twinn catalogs in the mail. Needless to say, they provided a lot of entertainment at our house. Look at that doll that has her own smaller look-alike doll! Where does it end, people?

Jess said...

At one stage in that video, the girl had a doll of herself who had a doll of herself, and the girl also had a dog, which appeared to have a dog of itself, presumably to act as a pet for the doll of herself. SO META, UNNNNGGHHHHHH...

Richard Whittall said...

I thought they said "Mighty Mormon" granola bars.

Leofan7 said...

I swear I saw Monica Lewinsky working on the My Twinn assembly line.

Anonymous said...

Get one made resembling your boss and put it on your desk at work.

Anonymous said...

I would bet money that JonBenet Ramsey had one of those My Twinn dolls.

Holden said...

My sister totally had one.

It was frightening.

Christopher said...

I'm really fascinated by the tropes of the infomercial genre.

One of these tropes is buying way too much ad time, and then desperately trying to think of something beyond the obvious. It's a doll that looks like your kid. Once you've heard that, there's really nothing more to say, but for some reason they decided to stretch that sentence out into a terrifying forever. Does anybody need to be sold on the idea that girls like dolls?

The other great infomercial trope is black and white footage of people failing to do simple tasks. I really hope there was a scene showing a little girl getting more and more pissed off as she tries to figure out how to play with a Cabbage Patch Kid that doesn't look anything like her.

Anonymous said...

Yeah I gotta say that my favorite part of this one was that the one doll had its own doll too. How small can these lookalike dolls get?

Anonymous said...

I would buy the dog, but then I found out the imaginary barking isn't included.

Anonymous said...

I would order a doll that has a doll that has a doll that has a doll that has a doll that has a doll that has a doll that has a doll that has a doll that has a doll that has a doll that has a doll that has a doll that has a doll that has a doll so I can picture the people on the assembly line attempting to paint freckles on individual atoms.

Anonymous said...

-wtf? now Marie Osmond is making dolls of the ENTIRE Osmond family?
-that Power Rangers crap looks like something that a dollar store would stock