EXPERTS GUIDE TO BUYING A HOUSE

FINANCIAL TRENDS OF THE 90s!

PHONE BILLS 4 GOD!

LAUGHING ALL THE WAY TO THE BANK HOUR!

THE SECRETS TO WEALTH

How do you spot a smooth talking demon?

MEMORY HOLE: DEATH AND MONEY

SPOOKY TOOTH: Split Infinity?

More SPOOKYTOOTH? YES PLEASE!

STOP STEALING FROM BABY JESUS!

TAX EVASION LESSONS FOR RICH PEOPLE!

MIKE LOVE'S LIFESTYLE

SILENT NIGHT '88

THE VALUE OF EXTRA VALUE!

KIDZ KNOW CASH!

What do these kidz know about cash? Everything.

TONIGHT! We are kicking off the Everything Is Festival Portland with EIT! Legends live show at the Hollywood Theatre at 7PM!

THIS IS MY STORY

CLASSIC EIT! PRESENTS SATAN!!!!!

For the next 2 weeks here at EIT!, Satan will be in control! So sit back and enjoy the ride!

666

777

888

999

ATLAS SHRUGGED PART III: WHO IS JOHN GALT?

Deeper Understanding rationally and selfishly presents the final chapter in the Atlas Shrugged trilogy.

Trade value for value and catch up with Part 1 here: http://youtu.be/DvmkIrspKCM and Part 2 here: http://youtu.be/Ynb0DQDCYMk!

Courtesy of the Deeper Understanding Collection!

GET THE HAMMER

And get cash! Cash! CASH! CASH! CAAASH! CAAASH! CAAASH!

Brought to us courtesy of Brett Hart!

MAKE MONEY THROUGH INCOME INEQUALITY!

Join us for more get-rich-quick quackery tomorrow night as Future Schlock and Defenestrator III present HOW TO MAKE MORE MONEY! Hosted by our genius co-producer Ian Abramson and featuring Chicago's finest financial gurus/broke comedians! Take charge of your financial future and join us Thursday, June 12 at The Hungry Brain (2319 W. Belmont)! 9pm! FREE!

EXECUTIVE CURSE!

23 Wolves knows how to get paid.

THE OIL INDUSTRY OF THE 90S

CYBERMALLS ARE THE FUTURE

MAKE MONEY, AVOID JAIL MAYBE!

What could possibly go wrong? You too can take charge of your financial future TOMORROW NIGHT at The Hungry Brain as Chicago's own Dan Friesen, Nick Rouley and John Eisenrich teach you HOW TO MAKE MONEY! Featuring a special slideshow presentation by Just for Graphs (aka Kyle Scanlan and Ross Kelly)! Video by EiT's Future Schlock & Defenestrator III! 9pm! FREE!

FEAR AND UNCERTAINTY

You can have both! Courtesy of the Deeper Understanding Collection!

3 MINUTE COMPUTER BEACH PARTY

GET RICH QUICK, STUPID

THE INTERNET = THE FUTURE = $$$

Thanks to Team Doom for the tape!

2 ATLAS 2 SHRUGGED: ATLAS BE SHRUGGIN'

Courtesy of the Deeper Understanding Collection!

3 MINUTE THE GLOVE

3 MINUTE THE DION BROTHERS

MONEY, MONEY, MONEY... HO, HO, HO.

This year, show that special someone just how much they're worth by heading on down to your local Everything is Terrible store to take advantage of our spectacular holiday deal spectacular!.

Holiday Tour! EAST!

12-7 - Detroit @ Corktown Cinemas (BUY!)

12-8 - Toronto @ Lee's Palace (BUY!)

12-9 - Montreal @ Pub Brouhaha

12-10 - Worcester, MA @ The Firehouse

12-11 - Troy, NY @ 51 3rd St

12-12 - Brooklyn, NY @ The Bell House (BUY!)

12-13 - Philadelphia @ PhilaMOCA @ 7PM (BUY!) and 9:30PM (BUY!)

12-14 - Boston @ The Coolidge Corner Theatre (BUY!)

12-15 - Baltimore @ The 5th Dimension (405 W. Franklyn)

12-16 - Pittsburgh @ Filmmakers' Melwood Screening Room (BUY!)

12-17 - Cincinnati @ Mayday (FREE!)

12-18 - Nashville @ The Belcourt Theater (BUY!)

12-19 - St. Louis @ Mushmaus

12-20 - Bloomington, IN @ The Bishop (BUY!)

12-21 - Chicago @ Lincoln Hall (BUY! )

Holiday Tour! WEST!

12-7 - San Francisco @ The Roxie (BUY!)

12-8 - Oakland @ ABCO Arts Space (3135 Filbert)

12-9 - UC Davis @ TCS Building Art Annex

12-10 - Portland @ The Hollywood Theatre (BUY!)

12-11 - Olympia @ Le Voyeur @ 8PM

12-12 - Vancouver @ The Biltmore Cabaret (BUY!)

12-13 - Seattle @ Central Cinema @ 7PM (BUY!) and 9PM (BUY!)

12-14 - Boise @ Spacebar Arcade
12-15 - Salt Lake City @ The Coffee Pit 

12-16 - Denver @ The Denver Film Center/Colfax (BUY!)

12-17 - Albuquerque @ The Guild

12-18 - Tucson @ The Loft (BUY!)

12-19 - Phoenix @ Filmbar @ 8PM (BUY!) and 10PM (BUY!)

12-20 - San Diego @ Che Cafe

12-22 - Los Angeles @ The Cinefamily @ 9PM (BUY!) and midnight (BUY!)

KOMMERCIAL KORNER

2 MINUTES OF NONSENSE

Sometimes our videos are cultural commentary viewed through a distorted VHS prism and sometimes our videos are a bunch of random people saying silly things. This is the latter.

NUMBERS MIX ME UP

Nothing fails like success.

WHO ARE WE?

A collection of commercials recorded during tv court shows. Who are we? Now that’s us. And I don’t have to stab my fingertips anymore.



Courtesy of the Aaron Valdez Collection. You can see more at Wreck & Salvage and Hard Stars!

All Dogs Go On Tour! keeps on trucking tonight in Columbia, MO at Ragtag Cinema at 9:45 PM! Buy tickets here!

YOU GOTTA FOLLOW FOLLOW FOLLOW!

All Dogs Go On Tour! keeps on trucking tonight in Iowa City at Public Space One at 8 PM!

CAR ADVICE FOR LADIES

Shhh... it's top secret.



Dublin! Darklight Festival! Tomorrow! 10PM! Buy tickets! ARF!

A BRIEF HISTORY OF THE FUTURE PART II

Briefly NSFMW.


Thanks to Dragon Sound, Airwave Ranger, Odd Obsession Movies and the person whose name I misplaced that sent in Absolute Aggression. Reveal yourself and claim your place in history!

Previously in the future...

COUPON HOARDING LEADS TO GROCERY HOARDING

But is it worth the time?

KACHINGO! = PROFITS

It's so easy to capitalize on economic disaster!

THE OPPORTUNITY BUSINESS!

THIEVES OF FORTUNE TRAILER!

2.5-MINUTE COMPUTER WIZARD

Oh for the days when a kid could be a terrorist and hackers didn't need computers at all...



THE QUEST FOR THE MAGICK CRYSTAL CONTINUES TONIGHT IN ATLANTA, GEORGIA AT THE PLAZA THEATRE!

EARN YOUR GET RICH DEGREE TODAY!

WINCHESTER, VA! THE QUEST FOR THE MAGICK CRYSTAL CONTINUES TONIGHT AT 10PM AT THE ALAMO DRAFTHOUSE CINEMA!

HAPPY APRIL 15!

Sorry for the late post folks, but you know how it is...tax day, always working up until the last minute.



(For all you non-Americans out there in Terribleland, April 15 is when income taxes are due in the US and every year everyone shits their pants over it)

TRAINING BY THE SLICE!

Thanks to Kevin Misiuda for the many, many pizza tapes!

CLIPPING COUPONS FOR SELFISH REASONS

I wish I was at SXSW, but instead I'm here clipping coupons for Commodore's Tough Actin' Tinactin. Hope you are all having fun.

COOKIN' UP PROFITS!

Don't listen to the experts; listen to old people!

GET TO WORK, BABIES!

Not only do children offer a second chance on your unfulfilled dreams, they also make great indentured servants.

LET'S GET GRIFTED

The whole tape is like this. Just a bunch of assholes lying about some product (?) called IDN. It's some sort of nutritional supplement company from the 90's, and I believe they have since been chased by the government for fraud or something. Love that cowboy, though.

EIT HOLIDAY SPECIAL PART 10: THE TRUE MEANING OF CHRISTMAS!

It's finally Christmas! On this special day, it's important to gather with family and friends and celebrate the true meaning of this consumerist perversion of an arbitrary date chosen to coincide with the winter solstice. Merry Christmas, everybody!

THESE DELICIOUS DOORBUSTER DEALS WON'T LAST LONG!

MAKE SOME SERIOUS MONEY

Some real talk about money this holiday buying season from the EIT family to your family.

IT'S A BAD BAD BAD BAD NOIR

Only through the magic of VHS can you win $100,000 by subjecting yourself to a soft boiled mystery multiple times.

GET TO WORK, TEENS!

Dude, these hip thirty-year-old teens will show you how to make serious bills in the Teen Biz biz. Suuuuweeeet!

POKEMON IS BIG AND MEAN FOR THE BOYS

You are right, kid. These things will be worth something in a few years.

WOMEN BE DIVERSIFYIN'

THE LAS VEGAS GURU

Slots ain't magic.