MERRY CHRISTMAS UDO KIER

2 MINUTE EROTIC MISADVENTURES OF THE INVISIBLE MAN

KISSING IS THE GATEWAY TO HELL!

Courtesy of the DEEPER UNDERSTANDING COLLECTION

CHRISTIAN ACTORS DYING!

DAYTIME'S MOST WANTED MEN OF PASSION

We have a show tonight in Denver at the Sie!!! Click here for tix and more info.

Our west coast LEGENDS tour proceeds tomorrow night in Albuquerque!

ATLAS SHRUGGED PART III: WHO IS JOHN GALT?

Deeper Understanding rationally and selfishly presents the final chapter in the Atlas Shrugged trilogy.

Trade value for value and catch up with Part 1 here: http://youtu.be/DvmkIrspKCM and Part 2 here: http://youtu.be/Ynb0DQDCYMk!

Courtesy of the Deeper Understanding Collection!

LATENITE HEARTBREAK!

LATENITE HEARTBREAK! from 23 Wolves on Vimeo.

Why do we hurt the ones we love the most?

KiDZ B THiNKiN'

3 MINUTE A SENSUOUS SUMMER

2-MINUTE GRAVITY

ALAN THICKE DOESN'T NEGOTIATE WITH TERROR!

LOL PLZ EAT MY BRAIN

Pre-twerk, post-Montana.

LOL Plz Eat My Brain from Everything Is Terrible! on Vimeo.

A LOVE STORY (NSFW)

UH STORY OF TRUE LOVE by everythingisterrible

And we got a show coming up in Sacramento @ The Comedy Spot - 8PM! Get yer tickets now!

ARE YOU NOT GOING TO SAY "GOODBYE"?

DA HIP HOP WITCH

Sometime in 2000, three filmmakers obtained footage of Eminem delivering a rambling monologue about ass play, and decided that this was compelling enough to develop into a feature film.

One year later their footage was found. Courtesy of the Deeper Understanding Collection!

3 MINUTE COMPUTER BEACH PARTY

1-MINUTE GARDEN STATE

Oh, you never heard that band? I can't believe you don't know that band.

POLICE HUMOUR

HAIR PLUGS: THE ONLY REAL OPTION

Cleveland Hair Clinic (CHC) apparently sued Puig Medical Group, with whom it had a long-standing contract to perform hair transplants.

"CHC's latest, most cutting-edge hair transplant procedure is the 'Brandy Flap,' in which a patient's hair-bearing skin is stretched over portions of his bald area."   See Cleveland Hair Clinic, Inc. v. Puig, 968 F.Supp. 1227, 1233 (N.D.Ill.1996).

 

Gross.

FAY HOLDS A GUN

THE BIG ENDING!

COWBOYS & ALIENS & A TAE KWON DO BAND

Harrison Ford had initially tried to get in on this project, but contract negotiations fell apart so he had to settle for a watered down re-boot of this movie years later.


Friends 4-ever!
Miami Connection is playing all over the place this weekend, including the 3 Rivers Film Festival in Pittsburgh tonight!  Find all show listings here

3 MINUTE BARRIO WARS

Finally, a quality rendition of Romeo and Juliet.

SENSE MEDITATION & DEATH SCREAM

He's not just happy to see you.

And you've probably seen this because some yahoo reuploaded it and it went big, but here's the original by CDT:

Courtesy of the Crazy Dave Tape Collection. You can see more here!

"MIAMI CONNECTION" 25TH ANNIVERSARY SCREENING IN CHICAGO!

Chicagoans! We have joined forces with Drafthouse Films to present two midnight screenings of lost '80s thunder-rager Miami Connection at the Music Box Theater in Chicago on Sept 28th and 29th. This past August, we hosted a raucous screening of this ultimate achievement in Taekwondo anti-sanity at our third annual Everything is Festival, which reduced the walls of LA's The Cinefamily to rubble! Join in for what will very likely be one of the greatest/unforgettable nights of your life and witness what even Entertainment Weekly calls their "new cult movie obsession." Facebook event page for these screenings can be found here.

EVERYTHING WILL BE OK

Kill Crazy edition.

Thanks to WrongMan for the music consultation!

And now, an excerpt from the 2011 feature length film, The President Goes To Heaven !:

NO FUNLAND ON SUNDAYS

You have 2 days to figure out why you shouldn't be doing anything fun this Sunday.

JESUS SAID KNOCK YOU OUT!

 In anticipation of this year's Everything Is Festival, particularly “The Rise and Fall of God” or “Religion’s Greatest Shits!” or “God Is Alive And Well And Living in Branson”, I offer you a clip from the movie, Lay It Down.

ONE-MINUTE MOVIE: "ONE TOUGH COP"

This is Stephen Baldwin's answer to everything...

CHRIST OR DIE

Give your life to Christ or else....



Thanks to Liz Austin from Ireland for the tape!

GET STREET SMART

With Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, because that's the celebrity they got.

Seriously though that "getting a job trap" is something yer gonna want to avoid.

THE EXECUTIONER, PART II

Thanks to Bleeding Skull for the tape!

ORGASM HARRY

After Harry Smith is mysteriously abducted by UFO's he becomes empowered to give babes orgasms just by looking at them. (kind of NSFW)

DUSTIN DIAMOND DOESN'T TEACH CHESS

I'm so very sorry.



IT ALL ENDS TONIGHT, DOGGIEZ! SEE THE VERY LAST SCREENING OF DOGGIE WOGGIEZ! POOCHIE WOOCHIEZ! TONIGHT AT THE BISHOP BAR IN BLOOMINGTON, INDIANA!

WHAT'S THE CODE WORD, BUTTHORN?

Attention Chicago: If you plan to attend the Midnight Screening of Gary Busey's "Bulletproof" at the Music Box Theatre on March 30th, you will NOT be admitted unless you know the code word...



And for those of you still on the fence, check out the poster we made:



And for those of you in Winchester, Virginia... you're going to the Alamo Drafthouse to see Doggie Woggiez! Poochie Woochiez! tonight, right? RIGHT??

DAVID

Hey everyone in Athens, GA! Don't forget to hit up Cine tonight at 10pm to see DoggieWoggiez!PoochieWoochiez!

MIDNIGHT SHOWING OF BULLETPROOF, BUTT-HORNS!

With most of the Doggiez on tour, we have taken over a midnight screening at the Music Box Theatre on March 30th, in an effort to show our Chicago dawgs some extra love.



Check out the Facebook event for more information.

And all you dawgs in Dallas, Texas better show up to the Texas Theatre tonight! BUY YOUR TICKETS NOW!

MOVE OVER, GARBAGE DAY GUY

We've been sitting on this one for a while, but its power can be contained no more. Behold the graduates from the Burt Reynolds Playhouse - Florida branch!



Thanks to Brendan D. Light and the staff at the Unicorn Cafe for giving us this gem.

CARNIVAL OF FOOLS (NSFW)

3 MINUTE MANHATTAN CHASE

After being released from jail, hit man Jason Reed wants nothing more than to reconnect with his son Tommy.

THE BUG CHILL

I've always said "The Big Chill" would have been better with zombies controlled by killer flies... and now I have proof.



In memory of Halloween 2011.

3 MINUTE GHOSTHOUSE

3 MINUTE BEAKS: THE MOVIE

3 MINUTE WILDEST DREAMS

Randy Sloan is struggling to write a song for his idol, rock star Russ Calvin. Meanwhile a man in black is trying to kill him. A rock 'n roll adventure about believing in yourself!

2 MINUTE BEACH FEVER

A young Japanese man is set on a quest by his rich father to find the world's best opening line in order to "get the girl." But when he teams up with Kato Kaelin and they stumble upon a magic love potion, insanity ensues.

MEET JOE AVERAGE - COP!

3 MINUTE SUMMER JOB

Be careful taking a summer job at this tropical Florida resort, somebody could get hurt having this much fun! "Summer Job" features an enjoyable 80's soundtrack with an original score and surprise cameo by OrKestra (Kelly Groucutt & Mik Kaminski from E.L.O.)

SEE BO TALK BO TO BO

Bo on Bo from "Bo Knows Bo".

DUSTIN DIAMOND TEACHES CHESS, PART 1

This is the first installment from "Dustin Diamond Teaches Chess", a FOUR-HOUR LONG instructional video that is chock full of terrible:



It's only going to get worse. You can thank Sharon Mooney for unleashing this unto the world.

BAD VIBRATIONS

What if a musician with no hands teamed up with a rave promoter? Perhaps he would become a Robo-DJ.



This movie is Vibrations. It should be coveted.

2-MINUTE BLAST! (WITH EXPLOSIONS!)

If you ever wondered why Eddie Griffin doesn't star in more action movies, here you go:



(And who would have thought that Vivica A. Fox would have already been in TWO two-minute movies this week? Two too few, if you ask this lowly intern-thing...)

FROM THE CHRONICLES OF "RAPPIN'"

Because who hasn't had a snack attack... then rapped about it... at a friend's workplace...

DIAMONDS ARE A CALL-GIRL'S BEST FRIEND

Thanks to Dragon Sound for passing along this deadly magick crystal!

2:20 MINUTE 2020 TEXAS GLADIATORS

This one goes out to our friends at the Alamo Drafthouse.

3-MINUTE BLACK NINJA

WASHINGTON, DC! THE QUEST FOR THE MAGICK CRYSTAL CONTINUES TONIGHT AT 8PM AT THE SOLLY'S U STREET TAVERN!

A LIL' SOMETHING FOR GRANDMA ON HUMP DAY

I tried to make a 2.5-minute version of the movie Rappin' but I failed miserably.

So here's something adorably inappropriate for you.



I still believe the 2.5 minute version can be done... I just can't cut out all that sweet, sweet rappin'.

THE PASSION OF TIM

"Superstar Mel Gibson (Forever Young, Lethal Weapon 1,2 & 3) gives a sensitive performance as Tim, a mentally retarded young man who falls in love with an attractive businesswoman in her mid 40's (Piper Laurie)."

Special thanks to the King of Crayons for this "special" find! And to Odd Obsession for having a VHS copy that wasn't worn to shit!

"One Love, One Blog"

PRO WRESTLERS OR RENAISSANCE MEN?

T.G.I.F., am I right?

Since the big-bosses are in New York City and I've got the whole E.I.T. office to myself, I've decided to do nothing but: a) park in Commodore's 'precious' handicapped spot; b) spin myself sick in Ghoul Skool's chair; and c) post uncut music videos by professional wrestlers.

I now present Macho Man Randy Savage 'rapping' "Straight from the Heart"


And finally, Hacksaw Jim Duggan's "U.S.A." (also known as the inspiration for Fox News)

MAXIMUM DOLPH!

Don't you want to be like Dolph? Of course you don't.



Special thanks to Odd Obsession, Commodore Gilgamesh, and Defenestrator III: On Broken Glass.

THIS ONE'S FOR THE BUTT-HORNS

A hard-boiled Gary Busey fights terrorists in possession of a super-tank?

Where do I sign up for this action-packed, thrill-ride?

MEET DETECTIVE MALONE... HE'S GETTING TOO OLD FOR THIS

In 1980 Castro emptied his jails... they came to America with a vengeance.

EIT VS. TVC PART III

If there's one thing TV Carnage taught me, it's the power of subtlety. Today I humbly present these two quiet storms...

SUPER SOAKER 50's 15 MINUTES

THE TERROR THAT IS "HORROR"

I first saw this movie during a Horror Film Festival in Columbus. It was a fitting venue considering that this movie covers all the sub-genres within the first 30 minutes. More to come...

THIS LEPRECHAUN'S GONE TO SPACE

The boner of the future:


Wizard!