Wednesday, January 19, 2011

3-MINUTE AMERICAN CHINATOWN!

From the director of Miami Connection! No shit!



Like Miami Connection, the stilted performances, incomprehensible character development, and awkward pacing of this "film" demand to be seen in full. That's why we'll include a DVD copy with all orders placed between now and Monday, January 24!

(PS- The sound on the movie itself is beyond awful. I cleaned it up the best I could. Sorry it still sucks.)

21 comments :

Jarvis Cockblocker said...

Z'Dar!

John said...

I love how they turned the tables. Instead of an old wise Asian man they used an old fat white guy.

Tyler Vincent said...

Where can you find Miami Connection and American Chinatown? It is morally imperative that my friends and I have film festival night at our house after seeing these beauties.

Georges St. Pierre said...

Jay Leno's long lost son everybody!

I remember it said...

Wow this makes Secret of Nimh 2 look like Citizen Kane.

Anonymous said...

Someday Robert Z'Dar's face will collapse in on itself and cause a supernova

Dragon Sound said...

In this movie, Robert Z'Dar looks like a cross between Mask, Robert Goulet, and Robert Z'Dar.

Ravenhallow said...

They couldn't get Leno back, but they certainly recast the chin. Yeesh.

>.> You guys should totally slip me a copy with my cat head shirt and Xmas special when you send those out.. <.<

Anonymous said...

Get a load of this guy, he's drinking while we embrace, WHAHAHA!
Ehh ahaha *mumble* what are you laughing at *trails off*
The hell? Did the director actually direct?

HAVE A FUN GUIZ.

PUSSY PUSSY PUSSY

marty said...

"I'll kill you myself, personally"

Cuz you know that being killed shouldnt have to be totally impersonal, ya know.

Anonymous said...

dat... DAT CHIN

Queen of the Macabre Fashion Sense said...

Most awkward kissing scene ever.

Richard Whittall said...

The silences were the most awkward ever. The whole of time passed through them, as well as the extremely loud jet in almost every outdoor scene.

Jin Woo Akiyama said...

He also directed L.A. Streetfighters which I saw in its entirety on Comcast on-demand. The fight scenes are awesome, but goddamn the dubbing is terrible and Bill "I burp at UFC 1" Wallace as Kruger is hilarious with his floppy looking kicks. Oh yeah "Have a fun guys!"

Laura said...

Z'Dar, my love!

Will J. said...

This reminds me of the acting scenes I endured while..."studying"...at Lee University, America's largest private Christian High School.

Ultra Fem said...

That was too long. LOL

Keith Olbermann said...

Bill "Superfoot" Wallace had better acting than everyone in this movie.

Anonymous said...

So a pump action shot gun defeats all martial arts? Is that the message? Glad I got 1 for when the ninjas come to my hood! Waaaaaah, HIYA! Ka-BLAMMMM! GAME OVER

django747 said...

I'm..... acting.....

Rowdy Piper said...

That white dudes face is unnaturally large.