Wednesday, June 06, 2012

HAMBURGER: THE MOTION PICTURE! SATURDAY!




If you’re going to base a movie on a food, why waste your time with Fried Green Tomatoes or Chocolat? Give the people what they want; boobs, boners, and burgers — and don’t forget super-offensive “humor”, explodin’ fartin’ fatsos, pool parties, and race riots! Hamburger: The Motion Picture follows Russell, a 21 year-old kid (who looks 42) in need of a college degree if he wants to see one red nickel of his family’s inheritance. The one crippling handicap that prohibits this from happening: any woman that crosses his path takes off their clothes and starts fucking him. After a string of lewd ‘n nude conduct, his parents force him to attend the only college that will accept him: Busterburger U! The film’s got a whole cast of kooks sure to offend even the sleaziest of sleazebags, plus the Chicago Bears’ Dick Butkus as the evil drill sergeant determined to make all of their lives a living hell. Think Full Metal Jacket meets Good Burger! All of this leaving your mouth watering? Cinefamily also has you covered with a full-on burger bar, plus an all-new found footage pre-show focused on fast food/industrial training films. Viva la Video Nights! GET YOUR TICKETS HERE!




13 comments :

John said...

I love bad movies but could not make it all the way through Hamburger. Surf II on the other hand...

Ghoul Skool said...

Weird that you say that. I watched 'Hamburger' and 'Surf II' in the same week and was not nearly as big of a fan of Surf. Maybe I was just in more of a hamburger kinda mood. Still, if we could get Deezen I would happily play it at some point.

Ponsonby_Britt said...

Hamburger: The Motion Picture + Hot Dog: The Movie = best double feature.

Anonymous said...

man, I'm 22 years old ad if I looked as old as that guy, something would be seriously wrong

also BOOBS ALERT! BOOBS ALERT!

Anonymous said...

PUT THOSE COOKIES BACK MOTHER FUCKER!

Anonymous said...

What was Scorsese thinking! If I were him I would go Alan Smithee on this bitch.

Sgt. McKinley, Royal Anon's...

Anonymous said...

The baby talking a bite was funny.

Anonymous said...

Yeah... massive cholesterol spikes in infants is always funny. So is heart disease.

mysteriorockanova said...

Kind of funny you guys are hosting this, because I just randomly found the opening credits on YouTube a little while back, and I didn't think it could get any more ri-goddamn-diculous than that.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dg1Yr3cgJOA

"Cooking burgers ain't exotic, but some folks say it's patriotic."

Mr. Walters said...

That hamburger bed, in the room when the guy is humping the pickle, is pretty sweet!

Ravenhallow said...

This trailer is amazing. Humping a pickle amazing.

Anonymous said...

"Hamburgers for America!!!"

I'm so glad the citizens of Hamburg are rooting for us...bless you, you wacky Germans!

Nate B. said...

YAY! I suggested this movie!