Tuesday, May 12, 2009

JESUS DIED FOR YOUR DONUTS

Your life is like a donut, and you fill it with Jesus? Wait, no. Jesus is the donut, and sin is the hole? Who knows, and who cares, all I can say is that when the 'Donut Man' tries to convert you to Christianity with a song, run.



Honestly, Donut Man, Jesus died on the cross and this is how you spread his word? The only purpose a Jesus-freak-breadloaf with bad puns has is to scare stoners, and the rest of the whole tape reeked of that sort of desperate brainwashing. I know it's easy to knock this whole genre, but in the end that mustache clinches it: You sir, are a Creepasaurus Rex.

22 comments :

Anonymous said...

I grew up in an evangelical church as a pastor's kid and had the pleasure of meeting Rob Evan's AKA "The Donut Man." I could not stand him as a child and I still can't stand him. The adult Christians loved him of course. Thanks for the reminder EIT.

marahe said...

finally, they've put the message of god into a medium that i can understand - donuts.

-- chase said...

"TOOLS" indeed.

Jay said...

Don't throw away you old tamps, ladies. That's God's money!

Payo said...

Time to make the transsubstantiations.

Adam said...

The first time the donut character pops out of the box with the brush in his 'mouth' (0:13) he looked to me like some sort of ass-face creature. Somehow it seems like that would be more fitting...

Arnold Schwarzenegger said...

Jesus is like a donut cos is a hole inside of me. Then, Jesus is like my ass. Then, I love Jesus.

Anonymous said...

Hey there,

made this clip back in 2000. Might be worth posting.
love the site!!!!


JPB


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ejIJXlWV0xQ

Anonymous said...

"it's the 'yeast' of my worries!

fuckin wow! man, like wow.

Anonymous said...

It's like Naked Lunch for Christians...

Anonymous said...

Is there a Mrs. Duncan Doughnut or are those doughnutlings born of SIN!!!?

PrincessHappySunshineButtercups said...

I remember being terrified of this when I was a child!
I'm glad to see it made the list.
For some reason, Evangelical churches love inexplicable puppet shows. Perhaps there is some sort of connection there, a dark secret we have yet to uncover...

Anonymous said...

There's a reason all those kids are wearing clothing labeled "TOOL".

Harrison said...

Wow, about five years ago my roommate bought me a coloring book called "Donut Forget". I never realized it was based off of something.

Anonymous said...

"Hey, blond girl with the pail, Camera 2's to your right. To your right, goddamn it! "

Anonymous said...

It finally all makes sense.

Anonymous said...

The host looks like Ned Flanders.

theory_of_everything said...

Producing things like this is why Jesus will never come back.

I think Christianity should just stick to beating children in order for them to learn about the Jesus.

scot said...

i love it
once we were owned by the devil
then a donut in the oven
anti-semitism for young enquiring minds

Anonymous said...

"the purpose is to scare stonres" YOU ARE SUCCEED SIR

Anonymous said...

... if god "bought" us, does that mean he can sell us? and if he sells us, does he gets full retail, or does he have to go to satan's pawn shop and haggle? or could he just return us? if he did would he need a receipt?

Anonymous said...

I don't know what scares me more the pedo-stache or the dancing at 2:17