When I watch video like this, I tend to imagine the amazing creative process that made sense to some group of people, resulting in this end product. Specifically, I try to imagine people sitting in a room, with someone saying: "Hear me out: A biblical rap, but with kids. Mostly white kids. And backup singers." And other people in the room had to go, "Ok! Great!"
Behind most terrible films is a shockingly large number of people. Trust me; I, personally, have been one of them.
I knew it! The announcer is Isaac Hanson and David is Taylor Hanson, the guitar player and lead singer for Hanson. Their whole family used to do christian music festivals in Tulsa, OK where they're from. MMMBop was honestly a step down.
in case you didn't know: this was written and preformed by multi-genre/crossover christian gospel artist Carmen- The actors in the video are members of his church and friends ... (By the way that is him as Goliath.)
---------------------------------- I saw Carmen in concert when I was a teenager maybe 13 or 14. My dad is the pastor of a nondenominational church. So, I pretty much had to go on my own volition or go by force. Believe you me, the rod would not be spared my friends if i tried to rebel. My old man would hit me with a hickory stick he called the "Giant Killer". He would hit me with no more than 39 lashes; the punishment I may have needed or not needed depending on how the spirit moved him. A number of times I had been bruised and the welts on my legs and back would sometimes bleed from the lashings. But I digress. It really sucked having to listen and see something, that I really had no clue of or cared little about. I was into Iron Maiden, Slayer, Diecide, Morbid Angel Unleashed ETC. So being forced to go made me hate everyone that was like the fool that was singing his "STORY SONGS!" Carmen. Consequently, I had already grown to loath and disgust my family. And the puppets that they had chosen to be my friends; their friend's children. I wanted to destroy the whole fanatical realm. I found myself trying to push my own will through the brainwashing, emotional scarring, physical and mental abuse with much labor and difficulty... That was like 21 years ago or so. I left home at 15. I wanted to kill Carmen and my father and rip there bodies apart! Stomping and sliding around on their wasted worthless lifeless bodies, until I mashed them both into a puddle under the wieght of my angry fucking body and feet! It made a depraved young man out of me and over the years I have done much,for lack of a better word, "evil" in this world because of it. Hm, I suppose I was doomed to be a depraved psychotic. heheh Because I still feel the same fucking way!
But Carmen is very popular amongst the followers of Christ.
i think the sound would only make this slightly more terrible
ReplyDeleteI kind of like it without the sound. It lets me make up my own story.
ReplyDeleteThe North star at night, is big and bright. *clap clap clap clap* Deep in the heart of Jesus.
ReplyDeleteDavid may got Soul, but he sure ain't got sound
ReplyDeleteThis was indeed terrible. Well done.
ReplyDeleteThe most interesting revisionist theology to date!
ReplyDeleteThis is by Carman, I used to own this CD, look up some more of videos on youtube; they will not disappoint.
ReplyDeletelove the jurassic park tshirt
ReplyDeleteI want this song to be from High School Musical.
ReplyDeleteI think the referee is Arthur from the original Degrassi Junior High tv show! Funny
ReplyDeleteJesus + Horus...eh, same diff.
You guys were very wrong. It is much better on mute.
ReplyDeleteWhat the hell is that monstrosity at the start of the video?
ReplyDeleteThe cheerleader in the middle made my sling feel all funny.
ReplyDeleteAAAAaaand it's gone!
ReplyDeleteWhen I watch video like this, I tend to imagine the amazing creative process that made sense to some group of people, resulting in this end product. Specifically, I try to imagine people sitting in a room, with someone saying: "Hear me out: A biblical rap, but with kids. Mostly white kids. And backup singers." And other people in the room had to go, "Ok! Great!"
ReplyDeleteBehind most terrible films is a shockingly large number of people. Trust me; I, personally, have been one of them.
His teeth...my god, his TEETH!
ReplyDelete"Verily, verily I say unto you, sing bang boom!"
Jurassic Park shirt @ 3:12 = EPIC!
ReplyDeleteWait, did David just call Goliath a bitch, or is that just (very) wishful thinking?
ReplyDeletev. nice ty
ReplyDeleteI knew it! The announcer is Isaac Hanson and David is Taylor Hanson, the guitar player and lead singer for Hanson. Their whole family used to do christian music festivals in Tulsa, OK where they're from. MMMBop was honestly a step down.
ReplyDeletelol at the Jurassic Park T-shirt, I thought Christians hated dinosaurs?
ReplyDeletealso, I didn't know the Hanson kids were Christians
I want to commit sin with all 3 backup singers at once.
ReplyDeleteAlso,Jurassic Park T-shirt at 2:31
David and Goliath story is from the Old Testament, yet dude holds up a John 3:16 sign even though Jesus hasn't been born yet.
ReplyDeleteTotally rad.
I second the love of the Jurassic Park shirt
ReplyDeleteSure he's that way with a giant but how is he against a priest?
ReplyDeleteArthur from Degrassi and Hanson in one video?
ReplyDeleteThis is why the internet has shrivelled my penis into what looks like and is as useful as a dead leaf.
AND THAT'S HOW I BEAT SHAQ!
ReplyDeleteWhy is that guy dressed like a fifties reporter?
ReplyDeleteI want to hear Nick Cave cover this.
ReplyDeleteI wonder if Taylor Hanson ever looks back on this video and wonders where it all went wrong...
ReplyDeletei knew this was hanson!!!
ReplyDeleteThat guy in the press box made me want to turn on all of the lights in the house, shut the closet door, and hide under the covers.
ReplyDeletethe narrator in the press box looks deformed, like some retarded burn victim..his face is terribly misshapen.
ReplyDeletein case you didn't know: this was written and preformed by multi-genre/crossover christian gospel artist
ReplyDeleteCarmen-
The actors in the video are members of his church and friends ... (By the way that is him as Goliath.)
----------------------------------
I saw Carmen in concert when I was a teenager maybe 13 or 14. My dad is the pastor of a nondenominational church. So, I pretty much had to go on my own volition or go by force. Believe you me, the rod would not be spared my friends if i tried to rebel. My old man would hit me with a hickory stick he called the "Giant Killer". He would hit me with no more than 39 lashes; the punishment I may have needed or not needed depending on how the spirit moved him. A number of times I had been bruised and the welts on my legs and back would sometimes bleed from the lashings. But I digress. It really sucked having to listen and see something, that I really had no clue of or cared little about. I was into Iron Maiden, Slayer, Diecide, Morbid Angel Unleashed ETC. So being forced to go made me hate everyone that was like the fool that was singing his "STORY SONGS!" Carmen. Consequently, I had already grown to loath and disgust my family. And the puppets that they had chosen to be my friends; their friend's children. I wanted to destroy the whole fanatical realm. I found myself trying to push my own will through the brainwashing, emotional scarring, physical and mental abuse with much labor and difficulty...
That was like 21 years ago or so. I left home at 15. I wanted to kill Carmen and my father and rip there bodies apart! Stomping and sliding around on their wasted worthless lifeless bodies, until I mashed them both into a puddle under the wieght of my angry fucking body and feet!
It made a depraved young man out of me and over the years I have done much,for lack of a better word, "evil" in this world because of it. Hm, I suppose I was doomed to be a depraved psychotic. heheh Because I still feel the same fucking way!
But Carmen is very popular amongst the followers of Christ.
WHy do they say this is rap.... cause its not
ReplyDeleteTEEEEEEEEEEEEEETH!!!
ReplyDeleteThose Hanson boys must have made some Tulsa orthodontist very rich! MMMteeeeeeeeeeeeef!
ReplyDelete