Tuesday, May 12, 2009

JESUS DIED FOR YOUR DONUTS

Your life is like a donut, and you fill it with Jesus? Wait, no. Jesus is the donut, and sin is the hole? Who knows, and who cares, all I can say is that when the 'Donut Man' tries to convert you to Christianity with a song, run.



Honestly, Donut Man, Jesus died on the cross and this is how you spread his word? The only purpose a Jesus-freak-breadloaf with bad puns has is to scare stoners, and the rest of the whole tape reeked of that sort of desperate brainwashing. I know it's easy to knock this whole genre, but in the end that mustache clinches it: You sir, are a Creepasaurus Rex.
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21 comments:

  1. AnonymousMay 12, 2009 at 10:25 AM

    I grew up in an evangelical church as a pastor's kid and had the pleasure of meeting Rob Evan's AKA "The Donut Man." I could not stand him as a child and I still can't stand him. The adult Christians loved him of course. Thanks for the reminder EIT.

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  2. maraheMay 12, 2009 at 10:37 AM

    finally, they've put the message of god into a medium that i can understand - donuts.

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  3. -- chaseMay 12, 2009 at 10:40 AM

    "TOOLS" indeed.

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  4. JayMay 12, 2009 at 11:32 AM

    Don't throw away you old tamps, ladies. That's God's money!

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  5. PayoMay 12, 2009 at 6:39 PM

    Time to make the transsubstantiations.

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  6. AdamMay 12, 2009 at 10:07 PM

    The first time the donut character pops out of the box with the brush in his 'mouth' (0:13) he looked to me like some sort of ass-face creature. Somehow it seems like that would be more fitting...

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  7. AnonymousMay 13, 2009 at 11:12 AM

    Hey there,

    made this clip back in 2000. Might be worth posting.
    love the site!!!!


    JPB


    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ejIJXlWV0xQ

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  8. AnonymousMay 13, 2009 at 1:01 PM

    "it's the 'yeast' of my worries!

    fuckin wow! man, like wow.

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  9. AnonymousMay 13, 2009 at 10:35 PM

    It's like Naked Lunch for Christians...

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  10. AnonymousMay 14, 2009 at 1:47 AM

    Is there a Mrs. Duncan Doughnut or are those doughnutlings born of SIN!!!?

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  11. PrincessHappySunshineButtercupsMay 15, 2009 at 8:51 PM

    I remember being terrified of this when I was a child!
    I'm glad to see it made the list.
    For some reason, Evangelical churches love inexplicable puppet shows. Perhaps there is some sort of connection there, a dark secret we have yet to uncover...

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  12. AnonymousMay 17, 2009 at 10:57 AM

    There's a reason all those kids are wearing clothing labeled "TOOL".

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  13. HarkibaldJune 21, 2009 at 10:33 AM

    Wow, about five years ago my roommate bought me a coloring book called "Donut Forget". I never realized it was based off of something.

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  14. AnonymousJuly 1, 2009 at 11:49 PM

    "Hey, blond girl with the pail, Camera 2's to your right. To your right, goddamn it! "

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  15. AnonymousJuly 6, 2009 at 8:50 AM

    It finally all makes sense.

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  16. AnonymousJuly 27, 2009 at 9:08 PM

    The host looks like Ned Flanders.

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  17. things_404August 5, 2009 at 2:29 AM

    Producing things like this is why Jesus will never come back.

    I think Christianity should just stick to beating children in order for them to learn about the Jesus.

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  18. scotAugust 13, 2010 at 12:27 PM

    i love it
    once we were owned by the devil
    then a donut in the oven
    anti-semitism for young enquiring minds

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  19. AnonymousAugust 22, 2010 at 12:13 PM

    "the purpose is to scare stonres" YOU ARE SUCCEED SIR

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  20. AnonymousFebruary 11, 2011 at 2:15 AM

    ... if god "bought" us, does that mean he can sell us? and if he sells us, does he gets full retail, or does he have to go to satan's pawn shop and haggle? or could he just return us? if he did would he need a receipt?

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  21. AnonymousApril 8, 2011 at 4:37 PM

    I don't know what scares me more the pedo-stache or the dancing at 2:17

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