tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7861284053127840659.post6022740418750271784..comments2024-03-11T02:00:32.115-05:00Comments on Everything Is Terrible!: KLASSIC KOMMERCIAL KOLLECTION!JerryMaguirehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08420800191357110891noreply@blogger.comBlogger20125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7861284053127840659.post-91891698249184483092014-07-17T10:01:21.976-05:002014-07-17T10:01:21.976-05:00The best advertisement I've ever seen: "B...The best advertisement I've ever seen: "Buy from us, we DON'T have cookies!"<br /><br />Sold.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7861284053127840659.post-39735885520654180412010-03-22T13:21:06.561-05:002010-03-22T13:21:06.561-05:00Heinz Ketchup: You will get laid!Heinz Ketchup: You will get laid!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7861284053127840659.post-23098496322298894872010-03-09T12:25:21.308-06:002010-03-09T12:25:21.308-06:00Before the Empire Carpet Pusher was reduced to a c...Before the Empire Carpet Pusher was reduced to a cheaply animated character...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7861284053127840659.post-28522700983738742772010-03-08T18:34:07.406-06:002010-03-08T18:34:07.406-06:00make it stop , MAKE IT STOPPPP
grip on the world;...make it stop , MAKE IT STOPPPP<br />grip on the world; fading.shodannoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7861284053127840659.post-25236768649044815012010-02-06T12:40:27.055-06:002010-02-06T12:40:27.055-06:00Heinz Gettin' Serious...
I'm gettin' s...Heinz Gettin' Serious...<br />I'm gettin' serious too!<br />http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s4ghHKhbZikMarshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01273147992763849185noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7861284053127840659.post-39320473744753619902010-01-24T22:51:44.086-06:002010-01-24T22:51:44.086-06:00It's not that the ketchup bottle is poorly des...It's not that the ketchup bottle is poorly designed. It's that the ketchup is very thick.<br /><br />I could get similar results with a cheap store-brand ketchup and an industrial food-safe thickening agent, but the heavy lifting would still all be up to the marketroids.<br /><br />And hey, chicks dig it! Apparently.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7861284053127840659.post-42998606412295040602010-01-23T12:05:55.232-06:002010-01-23T12:05:55.232-06:00Howard isn't her husband, he's her son.Howard isn't her husband, he's her son.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7861284053127840659.post-73604133544431459982010-01-20T01:59:00.159-06:002010-01-20T01:59:00.159-06:00How in the world did Heinz make it so far in the k...How in the world did Heinz make it so far in the ketchup business when their sole marketing vehicle for 40 years has been the fact that their products container is so poorly designed that you can't get even get anything to come out of it when you hold it upside down. How is this a "feature"? <br /><br />They made the hole too small! They didn't bother to calculate the expected flow rate given the pressure inside the glass bottle and the viscosity of the fluid it contained and they made the stupid hole too small! And then they made us sit through years of commercials talking about how great it was that the hole was too small!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7861284053127840659.post-47442814468872756052010-01-17T21:05:59.488-06:002010-01-17T21:05:59.488-06:00Holy shit, I live right next to Grand Avenue!Holy shit, I live right next to Grand Avenue!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7861284053127840659.post-92080168893062974272010-01-17T18:47:03.794-06:002010-01-17T18:47:03.794-06:00It's SO strange to see the Empire guy!! He ex...It's SO strange to see the Empire guy!! He exists.katyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12481219222042558527noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7861284053127840659.post-27077609223784495672010-01-17T13:33:58.591-06:002010-01-17T13:33:58.591-06:00Of course, any husband who could not have a cookie...Of course, any husband who could not have a cookie with his coffee in the morning because his wife did not get up at 5 to bake them would rightly whip his wife with a belt.<br /><br />But now she can use her Howard Pontiac to drive to her local supermarket to buy as many pre-made and packaged cookies as her husband could ever eat!<br /><br />Or indeed she could turn on the engine of her Howard Pontiac inside the garage and wait for sweet death because she can't bear to bake even one more fucking oatmeal raisin cookie.<br /><br />Or maybe Howard is her husband and he makes her endlessly bake cookies as a punishment for not helping him sell his quality used Pontiacs.<br /><br />So many possibilities!Juliannoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7861284053127840659.post-52434366559633688392010-01-16T19:22:24.010-06:002010-01-16T19:22:24.010-06:00Why do I feel the ketchup commercial is also tryin...Why do I feel the ketchup commercial is also trying to insert some not-so sly message about sex? 'Trust us guys, tease 'em a bit. Just hold it in and they'll be LINING. UP.' <br /><br />I also really don't understand the 'no cookies' ad. What the hell is this woman talking about? Although I do love it when she says 'Graaahnd Avenue'.Jon Pernisekhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15518513497962439159noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7861284053127840659.post-54173387261631624242010-01-16T18:34:09.463-06:002010-01-16T18:34:09.463-06:00i totally remember that commercial from live tv, L...i totally remember that commercial from live tv, LOLUnknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01638538284521793285noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7861284053127840659.post-67055672051678011152010-01-16T17:42:52.945-06:002010-01-16T17:42:52.945-06:00So good things really come to those who wait? Lew ...So good things really come to those who wait? Lew Miles doesn't like what Heinz saus, 'cuz Lew Miles is telling me to call NOW to come to Las Vegas!<br /><br />http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OsjLwaQwf9I<br /><br />http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ZuyWFU0XtU&NR=1<br /><br />Btw... hint, hint... I think I know where EIT needs to go next.<br /><br />http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vdPyMYy3bRw<br /><br />:-patdnexthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18339904136472258194noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7861284053127840659.post-65723623198623038422010-01-16T17:30:29.507-06:002010-01-16T17:30:29.507-06:00The carpet pusher buy really makes you feel terrib...The carpet pusher buy really makes you feel terrible for himColt McCoyhttp://www.bootcampmedia.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7861284053127840659.post-52830676123603092332010-01-16T16:18:01.198-06:002010-01-16T16:18:01.198-06:00I'm so glad I gew up in Chicago. I got to watc...I'm so glad I gew up in Chicago. I got to watch these when they came out.negrofrankensteinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02911997071350425570noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7861284053127840659.post-85855211161349338542010-01-16T15:56:04.818-06:002010-01-16T15:56:04.818-06:00Could someone please explain to me what cookies ha...Could someone please explain to me what cookies have to do with shitty used cars?Spafnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7861284053127840659.post-4294718736531605592010-01-16T15:56:04.584-06:002010-01-16T15:56:04.584-06:00The empire guy is real? I thought he was a cheap 3...The empire guy is real? I thought he was a cheap 3D cartoon.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7861284053127840659.post-64932282860678114922010-01-16T15:18:54.518-06:002010-01-16T15:18:54.518-06:00I remember the similar Heinz commercial starring J...I remember the similar Heinz commercial starring Joey from Friends. He put the ketchup bottle on his window sill and then went outside and waited for it to fall to his burger or whatever it was...Heatherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03997398389251178146noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7861284053127840659.post-27464548669328542052010-01-16T07:37:23.591-06:002010-01-16T07:37:23.591-06:00Never expected that otherwise upbeat Empire guy to...Never expected that otherwise upbeat Empire guy to do a commercial like that. Wouldn't expect anyone to. Makes the company look like its all the way downhill. Didn't anybody in the commercial industry advise them to make the company look confident and successful?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com